As we all know, today is Valentine’s day. I’m one of those people without a Valentine to celebrate with… so my night is going to consist of Netflix, reading, and Chinese take out. Anyone else doing the same?
I refuse to allow myself to become miserable over today. I hate that I’m so socially awkward. I hate that I’m scared to leave my house. I hate that I’m so quiet… I hate that I’m so scared to get close to people. I feel like I might have been attractive enough to have a date tonight, if these hadn’t been issues for me. But tonight, I drown my sorrows in fresh baked cookies from scratch. Would anybody like to message on kik?

Beauty and Body Mods💋

Hey guys, today we’re talking about Body Mods compared to traditional beauty. This is going to be more of an opinion post

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So its no secret that I absolutely adore different forms of body mods and alternative beauty, I’m in love with all of mine and I love the way that they make me feel beautiful and unique❤ and i plan on getting many many more (credit to this photo belongs to @ofmiceandsex on instagram). I really want these hip piercings, but ill be going over my next planned mods in a different post. But since I’ve begun this journey its a striking realization that not everybody thinks the same way that i do. A lot of people tend to look down upon anybody that looks different than the traditional cookie-cutter view on beautiful. And having constant insults thrown at me and rude thinly-veiled attempts at telling me I’m less intelligent than any other because of my piercings, has caused me to pose the question “can we look beautiful and still be unique?”
Of course my answer to this is yes. I personally get much more enjoyment out of seeing a pretty girl with a full sleeve of tattoos than seeing your typical blonde-hair-blue-eyed girl sporting the latest Forever 21 finds. I guess for me its because I like change. I like seeing new, exciting, and different. I like to change things up, and for me i feel like these are the types of people that become leaders, they’re not afraid to take risks and stand out. So in this case, why is it that we still judge people who look different? Why is it that its considered unprofessional looking to have a piercing or tattoos or stretched ears? It’s the new millennium. Its nearly 2015. Were not still in the 40’s where you needed to uphold yourself in the most perfect manner possible in order to be treated like a human. I feel like we all need to take a step back and take another look at out morals.

Kayandia.

In my journals and in my stories, I tend to write a lot about this world that I names Kayandia (because my names Kaia, get it?), and I think that it might just be a coping mechanism but I really like it so I decided to share a little bit about it. sorry if this is kind of scattered, I’m just trying to describe it how it is in my head

 

Here, everything is perfect and beautiful. There is no bad weather, the soft subtle kiss of the sun against your skin of summer, exists all year long. There are no hateful words, only soft beautiful ones that flow from your mouth like silk. No bullies, and suicide is impossible here, although no one would want to.
No drugs or cigarettes, we are all happy because we want to be, not because we need drugs to tell us to be.
There’s no peer pressure.
There’s no poverty because there’s no money. People won’t have to break their backs just to live. We won’t have to steal because everyone will have all of the things that they need and we wont throw them away in jail for just trying to survive.
This is the land for misfit children, orphans, people with mental disorders, or anyone that just needs somebody.
War doesn’t exist, there’s no fighting or wars to lose our family to. And we aren’t set apart by families, everyone who lives here is apart of one large beautiful family who is able to coexist happily.
This land is full of large old Victorian style houses with full wrap around porches with large open fields and beautiful tire swings everywhere
During the day we have free rain to do whatever we want, and artistic expression will be accepted and encouraged in all forms (even tattoos).
and as we live life happily and play, the soft sound of music will flow through the air everywhere, serenely and beautifully.
It’s the perfect world

So familiarize …

So familiarize
what having to swallow this pill its like
it happens all the time, they take your heart and steal your life
and its as though you feel you’ve died
because you’ve been killed inside
and yet you’re still alive
which means you will survive
although today you may weep because you’re weak and
everything seems so bleak and hopeless
the light that you’re seeking,
it begins
to seep in
that’s the only thing keepin
you from leapin
off the motherfreakin
deep end.

beautiful pain by eminem

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